Being pregnant with my fourth baby is making me tired. Introvert tired. Voldemort in the forests of Albania tired.
I did the math and at the end of this pregnancy I will have been pregnant for three full years. I started this blog to document how surprising pregnancy was. Then how surprising newborns were. Then how crazy toddlers are. Now when my kids shred toilet paper or I catch them riding their toy train around the living room at midnight I think “Sure. That seems right.” When I pregnant cry because Joe Jonas used to wear a purity ring or when I pull over to throw up in a McDonalds bathroom- yes. It all makes sense.
But one thing that never ceases to amaze me is how much more tired I am with each child. By my calculations Michelle Duggar should have been in a coma about 8 babies ago. I’m trying to come up with an example of how tired I am, that can accurately convey my exhaustion. I don’t want to talk to anyone. Ever. And I love talking. Sometimes I think I’m too tired to stand up in the shower so I think about taking a bath but then do neither. Instead of switching out my regular clothes for my maternity clothes in my dresser I just put a laundry basket next to my dresser to hold my pregnant wares. I didn’t go to a pumpkin patch this year, I just bought ONE pumpkin from Costco. (say WHAT?!) I skipped church two weeks in a row because I physically could not rise up from my bed. Even thinking of examples of how tired I am are making me tired. I’m so tired.
I can’t tell if it is because I have three other children or because I’m on the other side of 30 and pregnant and that is just much harder than being pregnant in your 20’s. I think what I really want you to know is that, sure, I’ve fallen off the face of the earth. Because I’m seriously so incredibly tired. But maybe it won’t be forever? I don’t know.