The first thing we like to do when a baby comes out is to figure out who it looks like. Does the baby have mom’s eyes? Dad’s hair? An uncle’s knobbly knees?
As soon as we’ve nailed down who the baby looks like, we like to nail down their profession. “Look at those wide hands! He’ll be a quarterback!” I’ve even contended that Owen will become a Professor and Maisy an Opera Singer. Nobody ever really says “This baby has a lunch lady personality.” Or during potty training “This baby is so anal retentive, he’s going to specialize in Freudian Psychology!” I’m not sure why we do this. It could be that babies are cute, but really pretty boring since they can’t talk. So, we search for things to say about their appearance. It’s not like we can talk to them, and even if we could, they’d just be going on and on about breast milk, like a hipster talking craft beers. I’m sensing notes of non dairy creamer.
So, to my children, I say, be what you’ll be. Maybe you do a really hilarious dance and I dream you’ll make it on SNL one day (it’s Maisy. Maisy is hilarious) but I’ll be okay if you do something more realistic too. The future’s not ours to see.
D-“I think he’ll be the savior of the wizarding race”
Mc-“I just hope he’s a Presbyterian”