an open letter to the ants in my bathroom.

Hey ants,

I see you there in the bathroom.  The upstairs bathroom.  Are you the back up to the back up of the ant reconnaissance team?  Guys, there’s no food up here.  Go downstairs.  It’s crumb city, crumb heaven, nay crumb MECCA!!  I got crumbs on crumbs on crumbs!  In fact, if you found the couch in the playroom, it’s entirely possible you could recreate the opening scene from Duck Tales.  AwhooOOoooo.  Are you hearing me?  I don’t want you to find it, I really don’t.  If you do, you’ll never leave.  But life on desiccated toothpaste droplets is no life.  Best of luck scent impaired ants.  Best of luck.  Until then I’ll keep washing you down the drain one by one like the demented lady I am.

Love,

Kaley

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