Date night. So, very, needed. So effing expensive. At least it is if you have to hire a babysitter because you have no family in the area. All you people with eager grandparents coming out of your buttholes can kiss mine.
Date night. I mean, if going to the bathroom with the door closed feels like luxury, having a date night is basically like yachting in the Mediterranean. When I’m not galavanting on my own date night, I’m quietly resenting everyone else’s instagram posts about their date nights. Especially people without children. “Date night!” they say, as if every moment of their lives is not a date. Whenever you leave the house just the two of you it is a date. It is you. It is him. There is no one else. That is a date. That is heaven.
Date night is important, so that you don’t end up like the ending of “Gone Girl.” #nospoilers
I already wish it was date night again.