A lot of my best friends are leads on sitcoms. I realize how sad and depressing that sounds, unless I’m reaching my base audience of lonely mothers of infants and toddlers and/or lonely fathers of infants and toddlers, in which case they would say “word.”
I get carried away and like to think I’m like these characters, or at least, I covet some of their base character traits.
Firstly, Jess. Jessica Day? New Girl. She’s quirky and rocks those bangs and is a teacher and wears peter pan collars. Jessica Day is a lot less mean than me and also has a better singing voice. I do however feel I share a certain quirkiness with her and also similar hair.
Who’s that girl? ….It’s Kaley!! I mean Jess.
Then there’s Mindy. What I really like about Mindy is that she’s unapologetically shallow and uses pop culture references with the frequency and reverence which I feel they deserve. She is also self deprecating and loves donuts. Two things I am too. If loving donuts is a thing. It is. It must be. Not like it must be! Like, it must be.
Let me surprise you with this one. Gina from Brooklyn Nine Nine. She has mad comedic dance skills, which I also have, but have a hard time finding appropriate venues to express them in. And then, I wish I had her unerring confidence. Also, she speaks emoji which is sort of a pipe dream of mine.
Finally, a curve ball. My inner mean girl loves me some Claire Underwood. She’s evil and well dressed. Everything else about her I hate and it sickens me, but there’s something about a woman who cooly glances at the TV News at a murder her husband may have orchestrated, then calmly turns back to the vanity to apply her powder, that’s a lady. I envy her calm under pressure. And ability to pull off the peplum dress trend. You go Claire! You hateful, terrible, just so so bad person.