On Officer’s wives and support systems:
I kind of thought moving to San Diego with the Navy wives would be like the babysitter’s club- for military wives. I love being a Navy wife. I have pearl earrings. I have an anchor tattoo. I even shop at J. Crew. But I’ve learned that many, many officer’s wives hate being officer’s wives. I’ve met some kindred spirits for sure, but I definitely feel that the camaraderie exists more with the enlisted wives. It could be true that I’ve just been a victim of being a part of ward rooms that don’t have a senior wife to figure out how to get us all together, or like here, we’re all just too spread out. Anyway, it’s not like the babysitter’s club, in case you were wondering. And I’m going to have to lose this baby weight fast. We PCS in July or August, and I don’t want to meet all new people lookin’ all frumpy. So, I’m jealous of all you people who live near your families or near people you’ve known for longer than 18 months. Super jeals bells.
On my pregnant body:
For serious, everything is too big. My boobs. My arms. My wrists, toes, and cankles. My thighs. My under arm boobs. My knuckles. My nose?! I’m not complaining, really, it’s just like, why can’t my uterus just get big? That would be ideal.
Man, I want a rug. A big, wool, chevron rug.
On the blinds:
Why did Twinky have to single handedly destroy EVERY set of blinds in this house. She’s a turd burger.
On my brain:
Hey, OB/GYN office. Why did you tape the calendar months down in the wrong order?! How am I supposed to know at 8 months pregnant that March comes before April if you’ve taped it after, and May starts with an M too? That was really confusing. And embarrassing. March, April, May. My new mantra.
On my emotions:
So far, I think I’ve cried twice this entire pregnancy. Mostly I experience pure unadulterated rage, but I’ve been able to keep it on the DL. Friday Night Lights has had me close to crying a few times, but I was able to keep it together. By hating Julie’s bangs. And Julie. ( Can I get a what what FNL fans?!)
On New Girl:
Why are you never new, New Girl?! I need you!